i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
