i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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