problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
