Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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