whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
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