why didn't you poke me back
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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