My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
where does the pee come out of this thing
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
