Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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