I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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