i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
