I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
