you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
