what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
