you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
