Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
