I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
