dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
