Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
