Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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