I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
