Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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