you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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