Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
This is the high leading the old right now
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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