operation have a gay friend backfired
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
