Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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