I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize