I want to walk on stilts...naked
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
FUCK WHALES
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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