I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
