So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
