Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
