the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
