oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize