u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
