New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
