You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
