so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
