My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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