wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
