Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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