We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
is wine microwaveable?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
