I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
