2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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