he shaved USA in his pubs
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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