I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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