So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
