my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
