White coat. Heels.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
