Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You ruined the universe
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
