she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
