I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
